


Come be lonely with me

by cryingoverfiction



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, VictUuri, jj can't tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 06:29:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11663502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cryingoverfiction/pseuds/cryingoverfiction
Summary: Was Victor Nikiforov lonely?Could the most famous ice skater in the world, with all the fame and fortune even be lonely?





	Come be lonely with me

**Author's Note:**

> I think I'm getting my groove back!  
> I started this at 3am after watching a bunch of vloggers explore haunted places and I decided to think happy thoughts and this came out!  
> I hope you enjoy.

Victor Nikiforov had never considered himself a lonely man.

How could he? He’d had great parents, and had always been surrounded by people.

In school, he’d always had a lot of friends, and when he took up skating he had a coach and rink mates with him. Once skating picked up, there were always fans waiting for him. He was never alone, how could he be lonely.

It took him a long time to realise lonely and alone were two very different things.

He remembers that night as if it had just happened. Every aspect of it burned into his memory.

It had been snowing that day, so there was a chill. Even though he had turned his heater on and cranked it on high, he’d still shiver every time he walked past the window to get to the kitchen. It was the first Christmas since he had moved out of his childhood home. There was a small tree in the corner with presents underneath them. His parents were supposed to be flying out to visit him, but their flights were cancelled due to the extreme weather conditions.

During that phone call, he had come out to his parents. He hadn’t intended to. In fact, he hadn’t planned on mentioning it. Ever. Being a gay man in Russia was nowhere as easy as it was in other countries.

His parents had gone silent over the phone. Every breath Victor took felt like a roar. Even with the mechanical whir of the heater, the hushed voices on the tv and Makkachin moving around on the sofa, there was silence.

It was minutes, _minutes_ , before they spoke again. A quick “we won’t tell anyone Vitya, we’ll keep you safe” from his mother and they hung up.

That’s when Victor learned what loneliness was.

From that moment on, Victor recognized that loneliness was following him.

His rink mates were friendly enough, but never asked about his life, about his family, his relationships, they only cared about the sport.

At this point he had no other friends, except for the eccentric Christophe Giacometti, but even he was too self-absorbed sometimes.

He was the world champion ice skater. Less people started seeing him as their friend, and more of an obstacle, needing to be defeated.

The reporters and fans got what they wanted to hear and went on their way, and Victor Nikiforov had realised. He was lonely. With nothing more than the company of his trusted dog.

For years, Makkachin was enough.

Yuri Pilsestsky came into his life and picked on him, and it was fun at first – when it had distracted him from his current predicament, but with using Yuri to ignore his issues, came the need for something more permanent.

So, he poured all his effort into skating. He wouldn’t feel lonely if he was only feeling competitive. After all, he did have a title to defend.

He worked and worked and worked. His hard work payed off, winning him another four world championships. This made him Ice Skating World Champion for five consecutive years. 

Women fawned over him, reporters scrambled to get their quote and make their bosses happy, and skaters looked up to him – but they all wanted to be better than him, and it was obvious what their endgame was when he spent time with them.

Over time, skating lost its magic. Victor had done it because he loved it, but somewhere between skating under Yakov, coming out to his parents and losing the world he thought he knew, skating wasn’t just an escape, it had become a prison.

He had immersed himself in skating to make himself feel better about himself, and now it was the only thing people associated him with. He couldn’t visit museums to look at timeless Russian art or have his say in politics because he was Victor Nikiforov, ‘ _the man married to ice skating_ ’.

When had his passion trapped him? Why was the thing that used to bring him immense joy now causing so much heartache? Where had he gone wrong?

He was thinking of throwing in the towel and moving on when he was brutally reminded of why he did it.

When he met Katsuki Yuuri.

He first saw him at the Grand Prix. The poor boy had ranked last and looked like he was feeling pretty sorry for himself. Victor could relate to that last part.

They met again at the Banquet, where Yuuri was drowning his sorrows. Another action Victor could relate to. “ _Russian men don’t see therapists_ ” his father’s voice rang in his head “ _Russian men sit down with a bottle vodka and if you have the same problem the next day you didn’t do it right_ ”

Apparently, the Japanese couldn’t handle their liquor like the Russians could, because Yuuri was a mess.

He was without a pair of pants within no time, dancing off with Victor’s rink mates and Christophe – who never left home without a stripper pole (something Victor vowed to never ask about).

He remembers Yuuri holding his shirt, a drunken mess, and slurring his words.

“be my coach” Victor had made out. Despite the alcohol fuelled request, Victor could sense the sincerity in his voice, and something changed.

Victor didn’t feel so cold and empty anymore. Something about this boy – a boy he had never met – made him feel good. Like sunshine on a warm fall afternoon, or rain in the hot summer. It made him feel needed.

Everything in Victor’s life changed after Yuuri.

Victor was making difference in someone’s life. Yuuri had been so defeated after his previous season, and now Victor could see the life in his eyes whenever he turned up for practice.

Yuuri was changing Victor too. Back in Russia, Victor would have never even thought about hitting on a man the way he would hit on Yuuri.

Japan wasn’t exactly warm to their gay citizens either, but at least they could go to sleep knowing they weren’t going to be rounded up and killed for liking what they like.

Even as Victor grabbed Yuuri’s chin and pulled his face close – they were inches apart – there was a voice screaming at him. It wasn’t safe to do this, except now it was.

The more time Victor and Yuuri spent together, the more Victor began to feel _alive_.

There was someone in his life who loved him. Maybe it wasn’t romantically yet, but Yuuri did love him, and accepted him in every way. And that was enough.

During the Cup of China, Yuuri had changed his final jump to Victor’s signature quadruple flip. Victor’s heart swelled at the sight. Had he truly inspired Yuuri so much?

Victor was so overcome with every emotion under the sun, and knew if he didn’t react accordingly Yuuri would spiral. Perhaps he didn’t react _accordingly_ , but his reaction was one both Yuuri and the crowd loved.

His associates back in Russia? Not so much.

That night he ignored 10 calls from his parents, and double that from Yakov.

Yuuri’s friends and family had been shocked, but welcomed Yuuri’s happiness with no exceptions. Victor wanted that, and now he had it.

Things progressed from there. Hand holding, dinner dates, more kisses, sharing the same bed.

Victor was starting to spend every waking moment with Yuuri, and he never wanted it to stop.

Victor was pleasantly surprised when Yuuri had proposed, because he was going to do the same when the grand prix was over. 

Once Yuuri had said he wanted to end their engagement and retire, Victor had panicked. He’d become so used to this man in his life and now he was facing a lifetime without him. He immediately sunk back into ice skating, saying he’d return.

Luckily Yuuri had come to his senses, and their engagement was still on, but Victor still felt the call of the ice, so he made the decision to return to skating and act as Yuuri’s competitor for a bit.

Yuuri had finally won gold, and retired that following year. Victor wanted to do one more season but injured his knee and was forced to retire, so they both put their effort into the wedding.

They ended up travelling to the United States of America for their wedding, given it was illegal in both Japan and Russia.

After their wedding, they settled in Hattetsu, close to Yuuri’s parents. Their marriage wasn’t recognised by the government there but they had the records and that was enough.

 

Victor remembered what it was like to be lonely, and how he hadn’t felt such a vile emotion since Yuuri had come into his life. He could only hope that when they grew old, they’d die together, so neither one would have to feel it again.

**Author's Note:**

> remember if there's a story you want to see you can request anything in the comments or head over to my tumblr (https://karaslut-writes.tumblr.com/) and send me a prompt! I love writing so please please please please please do me this favour.  
> Until next time guys xx


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